If you’ve found yourself in that dark and lonely place where divorce looks to be the only option, STOP! Divorce may not be the answer to what’s wrong in your marriage, YOU may be the answer.
Many times we exhaust ourselves with trying to figure out, “How Do We Fix” our broken relationships. But more times than not, I’ve found that we fail to look at the most common denominator in the equation, “Us”. Through my and my husband’s journey of saving our marriage, most of the problems that we encountered weren’t really because of outside forces or the “small stuff” that we argued about but was because “we” didn’t take the time to STOP and look at our broken situation from a different angle, “Ours”. Yes, your spouse may have stepped outside of your marriage and had an affair, yes, you complain and nag probably more than you should, yes, he doesn’t consider you or your feelings often and yes, you tend to overspend the most in the relationship. Yes…these are some of the issues and reasons that most couples file for divorce. However, if we STOPPED for one moment to understand that most of these issues come from a much deeper place, we would then understand that there’s no malice in how your spouse may be treating you at the moment. Most individuals don’t wake up with the intent to ‘hurt” or disrespect their spouse. It tends to happen because there are more serious and more underlying issues going on either in the relationship or within that person. The affair, the neglect, the lack of care/concern, the nagging and the complaining aren’t necessarily the REAL reasons for the breakdown in the marriage, however these issues are byproducts of an already broken and fractured relationship (the deeper issues) that must be addressed in order to move forward with any type of reconciliation.
In working with me, I will help you to find out and expose those deeper issues within your marriage or relationship that has led to the infidelity, the lack of attention, the overspending and so on. My marriage was not only saved but “restored” because we didn’t set out to fix the “small stuff” that had begun to show up in our marriage but we focused on the deeper and more internal issues, for instance, job stress, finances and lack of quality time spent together. Therefore, after realizing that it was the internal demands on our lives that were the reasons for the external reactions, for example, the over spending, nagging, etc., we realized that our marriage and our family was worth saving but we had to put in the work in order to do so (Save our marriage).
What You Will Get:
Free: 1 – 30 minute consult. In this consult I want to know about you and what your expectations are for your marriage. I want to find out where you “are” in your marriage (ie. constant arguing/disagreements, separation, on the verge of divorce or divorced already). And lastly, I would like to know your realistic expectations of using a marriage/relationship coach. What it is you hope to walk away with.Package 1: 4 – 45 minute sessions. These sessions will include practical steps that will give you the courage to first, understand your role and part in the breakdown of your marriage and how YOU will be the one to change the direction and course of your marriage/relationship. After all, I’m only working with you (not your spouse), therefore, you have to be the one willing to make the FIRST necessary changes. Secondly, you will learn how to put these steps into action in your marriage. You will honestly find that it all starts with YOU. You’ll find that using tricks and gimmicks in order to change your spouse or significant other isn’t effective. The real change, most often, comes from within YOU and your thought process about marriage in general but more specifically, your” marriage. Then, your spouse or significant other changes based on the changes they see in YOU…first. (these sessions will be conducted over the phone broken up into biweekly sessions in order to give you the time you’ll need to go back to your relationship and put the steps and tools we discussed into practice. Package 2: 5 – 60 minute sessions. These sessions will include everything offered in Package 1, however with the exception of having follow up calls from me 1 week after our 60 minute session. We will merely touch base to see how things are progressing and what are some things we may need to tweek (add to or take away depending on your particular need) in order to make sure you’re doing everything you can in order to put your best foot forward in your relationship and that your spouse is seeing those necessary changes.